The 5 Reasons I Have Resisted “Cruising” My Entire Life

Have done three cruises. One a Disney. Also crossed the Atlantic from Montreal to Bremerhaven, Germany on a “ship”. not a “boat” for those precise purists!
The best cruise ever was the overnighter on the ferry from Helsinki to Stockholm. I like short cruises of one day or less like the European ferries. To those cruisers who enjoy days at sea looking at miles and miles of ocean. attending art sales, and losing $$ in the casino go for it, bon voyage! Each to his own. Instead, I have enjoyed having made 75+ trips to every corner of Europe, over 100,000 miles in a rental car. That’s my style; staying in European boutique hotels among the natives. You’ll never get a genuine Schweineschnitzel mit pommes frites und ein Mass helles on a cruise ship. Stop and think: A cruise ship is actually a huge petri dish of viral cultures, ready for ignition. We have experienced that in the recent past. Cruise ship docks in port on Sunday, leaves the next day for another week or more, how adequately sanitized was the vessel? Nein, danke! Lieber im Mietwagen!

When I read this post, I had a good laugh. So you have never experienced a cruise and you have all these reasons as to why it would be bad? I used to own a cruise only agency, with that I sold travel for almost 30 years. After 50 cruises, I know a thing or 2 about cruising.

First, the crowds. It just depends on the ship and the cruise line. Royal Caribbean and Disney do handle the crowds the best. But there are many smaller ships from other lines that have 2500 or less passengers. Holland America and Celebrity offer a nice experience on ‘smaller’ ships. Every time I go on a mega ship, I think I will never find a quiet place. But, quess what? There are dozens of quiet, uncrowded places, even on a mega ship. The boarding procedures are very structured. Even port visits are planned out, so those big ships get everyone off in record times. They have to because the cruise line sell tours that have guaranteed itineraries. Small cabins, in the cruise ships of decades ago, that could be said, but not now. I usually book standard cabins, not suites, and I have found many hotel rooms that were smaller.

Bar Tab–Most people book a drinks package with their cabin. Some promotions give the drink package for free. Even if not included, top shelf packages run about $60/day, mid-level packages are $35. It varies cruise line to cruise line. Either way, after about 5 drinks, you have paid off your package for a day. Especially with coffee drinks included.

Dining–If you want to eat ashore, by all means do so. Coming back to the ship during the middle of port day is a waste of time. On the other hand, some ports allow the convenience of eating aboard the ship, as the ship is just your hotel.

Limited Time in Port–It just depends! There are ports that ships do an overnight stay. When you pick your cruise, you pick the itinerary that you want. There are literally thousands of itineraries on hundreds of ships. Obviously you haven’t done a land based tour, because it really isn’t that different. You have so much time in a city, and then you go to the next destination. But really, how much time do you need to sight see everyday? Most cruises average 10 hours in port. Plenty of time to see a lot of things. Many people do a cruise, to help them decide which island or port that they would like spend a week’s vacation.

WiFi–Really? There has been a big improvement for on ship wifi. In the last 2 years, pricing has come down significantly and speed has really picked up. Again, unlimited wifi packages are promotional inclusions, so you may get the wifi free. It isn’t a make or break item for the vast majority of passengers.

Cruising is the ideal vacation for most people. The cost savings and places that you can visit on a cruise are limitless. Some places are best visited on a cruise. The Caribbean, Mediterranean, Panama Canal, Alaska, Hawaii….or Bermuda. Have you priced a land based vacation to Bermuda? $3K per person, at least. A cruise will be about $1K or roughly 1/3 of the cost. Kinda bugs me that a blogger will project their perceptions instead of presenting the facts. Because many people are resistant to cruises and then finally do one, and they are hooked.

Hello Mark,

I agree that cruises are not for everyone for the reasons you mentioned. I wouldn’t go every trip or too often but my family likes to go on a cruise every 2-3 years. Here are my thoughts on your bullet points.

Crowds – Crowds can be overwhelming and depending on the cruise line, you might not feel like you fit in. Some ships might make you feel like you are in a retirement community, others like you are running with a pack of highly-caffeinated kids, and still others like you got out in a sketchy part of town full of shady people. But no matter any group can be fun. The crowds are happy and excited to be there. The feeling and energy isn’t unlike being at a big sporting event where people are excited to be there. I personally love walking onto the ship regardless of whether my fellow passengers are grumpy geezers or biker bar bouncers.

Bar Tab – You can almost always book a cruise with some onboard credit that can be used for a drink or two. Alternatively there are unlimited packages for those who need it. I personally don’t care about this so if I have a drink on the cruise, I’ll either use onboard credit or just have something on shore.

Food – The breakfasts and lunches are usually not much different than a Golden Coral or Hometown Buffet so we’ll usually scarf down a breakfast and get a snack or maybe lunch onshore to get a taste of local flavor. We enjoy the cruise dinners though. While it is a lot more casual than a few years ago when everybody would dress up, it is still a nice change and good opportunity to share a several course meal with loved ones, either before (or after) seeing the nightly shows.

Limited Time On Shore – The time is indeed too short but depending on the port and activity, it can still be fun. You may discover a place that you want to go back to on a real vacation. Or, you might see that the place really isn’t a good fit but at least you haven’t wasted days on it. And as others have mentioned, it is nice to visit more than one destination without all the hassle of transportation and switching where you are staying.

WiFi – Packages are much cheaper than they used to be so my wife just paid for one last time. For me, I LOVE detaching from work and reality. I’m happy with just hitting a coffee shop when in port.

Being “for” or “against” cruising is like being “for” or “against” hotels: there are so many out there, some are right for you, many aren’t.

A 4,000-person Royal Carribbean ship has almost nothing in common with a 90-person National Geographic ship other than being aquatic. I much prefer the latter, but I also recognize that people who love going on 4 RC trips a year truly enjoy that experience much more than they would Nat Geo.

We took our first cruise in 2012 on Disney due to the childcare options. We have 3 kids and no family around to help, so we were exhausted and looking for a vacation that gave us a little break. My youngest was 1 year old at the time. It was a great fit for us, and since that first cruise we’ve been on 6 more Disney cruises. Now that my kids are older, we don’t need the onboard childcare as much but my kids still love cruising. My older two kids love the freedom of a cruise (they can get unlimited ice cream and steak!) The tween and teen clubs on DCL are awesome. We are trying Royal Caribbean for the first time this summer. I don’t like crowds either, but I’ve always found remote spaces on a cruise ship to chill out and enjoy the views.

The easiest way to tell that you have never been on one–you keep calling it a boat, not a ship. There is a difference, because, as a general rule, a boat can fit onto a ship, but a ship cannot fit onto a boat. A ship, in other words, is a very large ocean-going vessel, while a boat tends to be much smaller. Additionally, a ship usually is defined as having a displacement larger than 500 tons.

I have been on one cruise, Disney in 2002 when my son was 4.

Ridiculously cheap after 9/11. Took my parents as well as wife and son

Dad told me afterwards he was rolling his eyes going into it, but it turned out one of the best trips of his life.

And I took a case of beer on. Saved probably $100.

I couldn’t stop grinning when I read the title of your article as I have always had the same thoughts when it comes to cruising although my biggest problem is not being on firm ground for so long – perhaps I should have never watched Titanic 🙂 It sure is a shame since I live in a city with one big cruising port and see those ships all the time but I share the same feelings you have on cruising; I will pass and fly instead.

David Foster Wallace, Shipping Out (the PDF is readily available on the interwebs). Or alternatively, A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again.

Cool Breeze made some valid points. There is a big difference between the mass market lines (think 3000 passengers and up) and smaller ships (Azamara, Oceania, Viking) and the more luxe lines (Crystal, Seabourn, Regent, Silversea). The biggest drawback for me can be the expense (I do like getting hotels on points!!) although there are some good deals to be had.

I like independent land travel more, but I think cruising has its place, especially for itineraries that are more difficult to do independently. For example, we did a Baltics cruise on Azamara from Copenhagen to Stockholm which had a 3 day/2 night stay in St. Petersburg. Using CruiseCritic’s roll call feature, we arranged for some private shore excursions, rather than pay for pricier ship run excursions. Groups were small, and our fellow travelers were interesting, and well traveled. In some ports we did our own DIY exploring. We had some late nights in port, and in Gdansk, the ship brought Lech Walesa on to talk to us. We added on pre-cruise time in Copenhagen, and had planned extra days in Stockholm at the end, but I broke my foot (my fault) the next to last day and ended up flying home when the cruise ended.

Second example – we just took an Oceania cruise from Barcelona along the south coast of Spain, to Madeira (Portuguese island), and 3 of the Spanish Canary Islands, ending in Lisbon. We added time pre- and post-cruise, and mostly did our own exploring with a few private shore excursions again arranged online. This ship had 4 specialty restaurants with no upcharge and the food was amazing. They also did Spanish themed cuisine a couple of nights, again with amazing food. We met lots of interesting, well-traveled people here, too.

In June we are cruising around the British Isles for 18 days on Oceania, circling England, Scotland, Wales and Ireland. Lots of late nights in port, our own independent exploring many days and a few small privately arranged excursions on other days. And no driving on the left side of the road! That alone keeps the peace in our marriage! If you had asked me years ago, I never thought I’d be doing something like this.

Yes, we will do our own land trips again, I am sure. But we are also retired now, and although we are in good health and active, we don’t always want to be doing all the moving around, dragging luggage, hassling with rental cars overseas, hopping trains, finding restaurants, etc. So, don’t write cruising off (I did for years and years). There are many different types of cruises – you have to find the one that fits you.

Not a fan of Vegas and Disney hardly fares any better. Cruising has never really appealed to me except *maybe* to Alaska, only because you can enjoy scenic vistas from the boat (mountains draw me like a magnet…most of my top must-see destinations are mountainous: Switzerland, Norway, Armenia, Nepal, New Zealand, Peru, Hokkaido). The crowds and limited time on shore/set itinerary turn me off as well. Definitely share your sentiments.

We are kindred souls. I’ve never taken a cruise although I’ve been on the Alaska ferry system, which allows for awesome sightseeing and the ability to make shore trips of the duration of one’s choosing. Mid-May through late June tends to be the driest time of the summer in Southeast Alaska, for those who are interested. The ferry system is also quite reasonably priced and some ferries even have basic private rooms with beds, toilets and showers. The food on the ferry system is also freshly prepared and surprisingly quite good.

I have cruised almost every cruise line. From Caribbean to Canada to South America to Europe (Russia-Naples). Also have done the Gate1 inside European tours. There are equal pros and cons to both land and cruising. But, don’t ever knock cruising…. when in your life can you Board a floating city in Florida and end up in usvi St Johns( my ultimate fav) and the rain forest of Puerto Rico, with a final stop in Bahamas (day trip to the Baja mar). The key to cruising is: NEWER ship build and stick to the better lines(royal, Norwegian, or celebrity[my fav]). Notice I didn’t mention Viking or Regent due to $$$$$. MSC did a great job with their newest Seaside ship, but their food was too Euroish(too basic/tasteless) for my blood

I agree with all of your reasons plus while virus outbreaks don’t occur every time, it’s often enough to be another check mark in the NO column.

And I disagree that they are affordable ways to see multiple destinations in one trip (generally – always possible exceptions). I’ve priced out cruises before when I wanted to see multiple places…I could always do it cheaper via alternative means. And I could actually spend decent time in each city and actually experience the place.

Sure, smaller and shorter specialty cruises are sometimes better – or the only – option. I’ve done a few and enjoyed them. It’s the big cruises where there are other options that I’m thinking of.

I love boats and received basic sailing training years ago. So I’m happy to go sailing

I like cruising but I can understand your reservations. I think the thing to keep in mind is that all cruise lines or even cruise ships are equal. Some cruises include liquor, some include excursions. Some are short party or spring break type affairs while others are high brow events. It’s like saying I don’t like staying in hotels because they are so structured or are dirty or….. They vary, a lot.

Imagine a nice resort that moves every night to a new fun location. You unpack once.

With your opinions stated I would suggest staying away from Carnival, RCL and NCL. Disney is overpriced like the parks but would appeal to you if you like Disney and they offer top rate food and service much like a Disney resort does. High end cruise lines might also work for you if you don’t want to cruise with children or like a calmer experience.

https://www.virginvoyages.com/

LOL “Disney World and Las Vegas had a hideous baby.” So true, but also like a hideous old person.

Comments are very long on this hot debate. I think where I fall firmly into the “against” category is from my own experiences. Maybe somewhere between wet T-shirt contests on Carnival to “How to Take Care of Your Feet” breakout sessions on NCL there could be a cruise that fits.

As it stands, though, cruises feel like floating & confining food orgies to me.

I think you should look at Virgin Voyages, this is Richard Bransons new venture. He is building cruise ships for people that don’t like to cruise. Free wi fi, no buffets, no dress code, free soda. adults only

Comparing cruising to other types of travel is apples to oranges. If you are going to focus on the negatives you can find problems with any type of travel. There is nothing like waking up each morning in a new port with no packing or unpacking needed since your hotel room moves with you! Going to dinner every night where the waiter knows your name and the food is fantastic and free! Bar tabs and wifi can easily be included in the fare so only a problem if you do not plan the trip well beforehand. In the end cruising may not be for everyone, but I bet half of the everyone who thinks its not for them would change their minds after just 1 cruise on a quality ship!

First, not all the ships are huge. Some major cruise lines have ships as small as 1200 passengers. I sail on HAL on ships that hold between 1200-1800 passengers. Second, you can end up with shipboard credit that can pay for your bar bill. Not all ships have crazy drink prices. Most have happy hours where drinks are two for one. Some will let you take a bottle of wine on board per person for free. Some times ships will have long port calls such as 8am to 11pm. Even with 8am to 5pm, there is even time to see if you like a place enough to see if you would want to come back. In each of the ports, you can eat native food, and many times the ship will cook native dishes as well. Often you can get free WiFi on shore. Personally, I like going on a cruise to be detached from email and the web. The main reason I got into cruising was because it was cheaper than traveling to these places on my own and has more thrown in-like entertainment. I have no desire to be on a ship with 5000 passengers. And yes, your cabin may not be big, but some lines have bigger cabins than others and there are lots of public areas to go to rather than stay in your cabin. Do you go on vacation and stay in your hotel room? It is also a little short sighted to say you wouldn’t like a cruise if you have never been on one. I thought I would not like Alaska until I went-it was amazing and I went on a cruise much cheaper than I could do in a land trip!

I think the reasons for not cruising are all valid. Expanding on your drinks argument, I find that large cruise ships are designed and focused on extracting additional funds from passengers beyond the base fare already paid. Surcharged dining venues, casinos, shipboard shopping malls, commissioned shore excursions, drinks, art and jewelry exhibitions are all add-ons that you’ll pay for on your room bill on the last day. While I find cruises relaxing I’m always wary of vacation budget overruns.

That said, I think cruising does have a place when it comes to specialty cruises. The chance to sail on smaller ships with Windstar, naturalist lead cruises to the smaller islands on Indonesia or the Pacific, or the chance to see remote places in the world that could only be reached by ship such as the Northwest Passage or Norwegian Fjords. Consider the less obvious before writing it off entirely.

Hi Mark. I’ve only been on two cruises on my life so far. One in 2004 cruising the Mediterranean with Royal Caribbean from Barcelona with our family (4 kids from 10-19 at the time). We traveled with a large group of friends and their families. We are together every evening in the main dining room. Littles kids enjoyed the onboard rock climbing and kids club and pool snacks. Adults loved the food and the “disco” / bar. Every day we got off the ship to your the local towns – train ride to Monaco and Nice, tour of Rome and Florence, boat trip to Capri. Everyone had a great time and we needed no car rental and no hotels, except our pre-cruise stay in Barcelona. Following the cruise we did rent a van and drove to the South of France where we rented a villa and enjoyed the local food and wine and beaches and water parks and such. Second cruise was last year touring the Alaska Inside Passage without kids. We booked a verandah suite so we had access to the lounge and plenty of room to watch the amazing scenery including glaciers, whales, eagles and more. We dined at our leisure including 24-hour in-room dining. We did a couple of the tours for whale-watching and Yukon train ride. There’s plenty of time to walk around the ports and go to a restaurant or bar. We didn’t do any drink packages but brought a couple of bottles of wine with us. We followed up the cruise with three days in Vancouver – great walking city. We went to a concert and enjoyed amazing food. Bottom line is don’t dismiss cruises out of hand. They are great options for some locations but I’m not a fan of some aspects of cruise culture, such as buffets, endless shopping, and mandatory tipping but I can see this is not different to our love of hotel and airline elite status. I am not eager to book another cruise but there may be another place where it makes sense. I wouldn’t cruise Hawaii – just prefer to be on land for several days and enjoy the island life and occasional catamaran whale watching sunset dinner cruise. PS I suffer from sea sickness so I had a fear of cruising for a long time – now use SeaBands and they work.

The first time I ever went on a cruise was as a family reunion trip with my extended my family (roughly 30 of us total) one summer when I was 15 years old. I actually enjoyed it! It was an Alaska cruise so the itineraries were relaxed to begin with; plus there are parts of Alaska that is best seen on a cruise so it made sense. I felt it was a great way to vacation for my parents since they just let us go and do our own thing during the day but obviously we all met up for dinner each evening.
Overall I think cruising is done best as a family reunion or a group trip with friends. I have friends who love to do a cruise trip first so they can visit several cities in one trip…. and if they fall in love with a city, they’d simply come back to that city another time for a week or two.

Insightful analysis. I don’t disagree. I’m a fan of both cruising and land-based vacations, but each one fills very different goals. When it comes to takin’ it easy all-inclusive style on the cheap, cruising is hard to beat. The booze issue you mention is pretty easily resolved with a little resourcefulness. I pretty much look at cruises as a good, cheap, all-inclusive time with friends in nice weather. I don’t view them as an opportunity to get to know anything about the ports for the reasons you mentioned. Sometimes, that fits the bill.

I love all kinds of travel including cruises. One of the most fun trips we ever did was one week driving across France with our 18 yo and 7 yo and staying in a different place nearly every night and having the freedom to see whatever we wanted for whatever length of time. And then we dropped the car in the train station at Perpignan and took a train to Barcelona, explored for a day and got on a cruise ship the next day with stops in Italy and France. It was the best of both worlds bc 2 weeks of driving from place to place figuring out where to eat dinner and changing hotels would have been a bit much. So we had one week of freedom but really relaxation or luxury. And then one week of still seeing some stuff, less freedom but plenty of relaxation and fun. We did Norwegian and it was better than others bc we got staterooms for the same price as cramming 4 of us in one stateroom, we got free drink packages (had to pay $95 each for gratuity though) and we got free WiFi. And no set dinner time and no set dinner table/companions! Food was great and it is a wonderful way to introduce kids to “fancy” foods without spending a fortune. My youngest discovered she loves escargot! I wouldn’t want to do every vacation as a cruise for sure, but a combo trip was super fun and a great way to do Europe with kids. We actually had more space than in our hotel rooms!

You’ve already made up your mind about cruising, so why are you asking for comments? My wife “didn’t like cruising” before she went on one, and we literally just got off the Norwegian Getaway three hours ago – our 15th in the past four years. I could debate all of your points except the WiFi one (though the WiFi was remarkably Ok for us on the Allure of the Seas last September), but will leave it with the simple advice of trying it once before you discard something that millions of people have enjoyed.

Mark,
I think you nailed it on the head for me too. My wife absolutely loves cruising, I tag along. We have one coming up in September (Rome-Athens). In this case, I’m looking at it from the standpoint of getting from Italy to Athens in seven days or about the same time it took to do the trip 2,000 years ago. The 2-hour, $150 flight would suit me just fine. One last comment, you forgot to mention the Norovirus.