How Miles & Points Have Made My Marriage Even Better
Miles & points have done a lot for me and my family. They have opened doors that would normally be closed. We have visited and experienced things that would have never been possible without them. But I think they have also made my marriage stronger. That is kind of weird to say but it is true.
What Do You Mean?
Many of you are probably thinking I am talking about taking family trips or couples only trips, but I am not. Don’t get me wrong those are important and they do strengthen our bond. When people have small children they get so overwhelmed and invested with them that they tend to lose their connection some. Taking trips together, without the kids, is an important part of keeping that connection strong.
Another part that gets lost in a marriage and when you have kids is yourself. Sometimes you lose yourself in the mix of family, kids, and marriage. You are no longer the most important person in your life like you were when you were younger. And while this is a good thing it is also important to rediscover yourself from time to time. It is important to get away from it all and just decompress some. And miles and points have let my wife and I do just that!
Recent Examples
I am going to focus more on my wife since you guys know many of my travel stories. There are a few different things we have done this year that gave her some much needed, and deserved, me time.
Girls Trip
Each year I like to send my wife on a trip with one of her girlfriends. It is usually a beach location and it gives her a few days to relax and release some stress. This year they went to Puerto Rico where they had that Uber driver scare. She was able to see a new place and get some time with a very close friend that she doesn’t get to see that often.
Surprise Hotel Room
The last few months of travel have been kind of crazy for me, not Shawn crazy but still crazy. I was gone 4 of 5 weekends hitting Denver twice, Hawaii, and Amsterdam. One of those trips happened during Mother’s Day (which was me not paying attention 😖). My wife is not my mother but she is mother to the most important people on this Earth (to me), my kids. So knowing I would be sticking her alone with the little devils 🤣 on Mother’s Day I wanted to do something special for her.
On the one weekend I was home I booked her a hotel room at a near by Hyatt Place. This gave her a night to herself to relax and just decompress. We picked her up the next morning and she looked rested and happy. I could have taken the kids somewhere and given her the day at home but there are too many distractions at home and she would have ended up picking up stuff etc.
House to Herself
Lastly, the kids had a track meet early in the morning about an hour away from our home. I really didn’t want to fight traffic early in the morning or have to get up at the crack of dawn. I also thought it would be nice to give my wife a night at home where she didn’t have to worry about kids, baths, picking up after them etc. So I booked a cheap Hilton hotel near the track meet and away we went. This gave my wife a few precious hours of peace and quiet in the house.
You Get The Kids Alone
One of the bonuses of doing things like this is you get the kids alone. For me at least, when I know I will be alone with them for a longer period of time I take a different approach. I know no help is coming and that I need to be more patient with them etc. They also can’t use the I’ll ask mom card either! I think those times are more special and the bond you have with your kids grows in those moments. That is a bonus perk of doing things like this, for me at least.
Final Thoughts
Being away from your family for long periods of time is never a good thing. But doing it in small doses to recharge your batteries and rediscover yourself is important in my opinion. Don’t lose who you are and make sure you carve out a little me time here and there. You don’t want to lose the person your significant other fell in love with do you? Make sure both parties get to take part in it as well.
None of these experiences would have been possible without miles and points either. There is no way I would be able to spend $200 for a one night hotel room just because but I could drop 8,000 Hyatt points (and pick up an elite night credit 😉).Then use those recharged batteries to take some amazing family and couple vacations too!
Does anyone else do similar things to this?
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[…] first issue I had was on a recent trip to a DoubleTree in Michigan. I had planned to take the kids there to swim for the night before heading to a track meet the next day. We fought traffic for two hours on the way there and I kept them calm by promising we would hit […]
I want to read the post about what your wife thinks of you gone 4 weekends with friends without her; forgetting Mothers Day; & making amends with 1 night alone at a crummy Hyatt Place. Then let me know how all that condensed time apart from each other resulted in a happier marriage from her perspective.
Pam one weekend was the Arby’s trip which was unplanned originally and the other was a work trip to Boarding Area’s headquarters.
The other two trips were discussed in detail, as all of mine are, and given the okay by her. She also didn’t realize the one was over Mothers Day. These are not decisions I ever make on my own.
But thanks for the snarky, condescending comment….
I’d be be happy to address that for you Pam! I understand my husband’s job takes him away at times. Sometimes that travel snowballs and we get some back-to-back weekends without daddy, yes. But I also know (and obviously you wouldn’t) that my husband coaches soccer at our kids’ school, and picks up the kids from school daily (which sometimes means over 60 mins of driving one-way) and makes dinner when I’m running late, and does 90% of the yard work and on and on and on…. So, if he’s gone 1 or 2 weekends a month and it contributes to his CAREER – that’s fine. I cherish the alone time with my kids that I don’t normally get working 9-6 every day. NOT TO MENTION the wonderful and frequent family time we get during vacations because of said career, that otherwise wouldn’t happen. I’d say we have a pretty happy balance. And by the way, I LOVED every minute of my Hyatt stay in Royal Oak.
When I read a comment like yours Pam it reminds me that the content is merely a reflection of your own life. Life can be hard at times, hopefully you can find happiness without projecting your frustration on others whom you know little to nothing about.
Thanks for writing about the less sexy side of this hobby, Mark. Points and Miles are sending my wife and her sisters to NYC this coming summer, give her numerous weekends in Chicago with her mom, and we’re just coming off a week in Daytona Beach where I got to pay for 2 rooms so her parents could come with to help out with our two young kids. None of these are aspirational properties or rooms, but they give my family opportunities we normally would not have. Keep up the good work.
“None of these are aspirational properties or rooms, but they give my family opportunities we normally would not have.”
I couldn’t have said it better myself Jeff….that is my favorite part of the hobby. The luxury is nice from time to time but this is where the real value lies imo.